I was home alone again last night and so it was time to play bad movie bingo again. And it was Pierce Brosnan time again! In fact I am thinking of sticking with Brosnan for my bad movie nights, there is a fair selection. This time Amazon took my £2.79 and sent me Butterfly on a Wheel from 2007.
Meh. I know, I know we are supposed to stop using that internet expression of boredom and indifference but really ... Meh.
Butler and Bello have the perfect life, the perfect marriage and the perfect poppet of a child. Do you think that something might be going to change all that? You would be right. And that something comes along in the shape of Brosnan who kidnaps their daughter and plays a cat and mouse game with them over 24 hours. There are twists and turns and nothing is what it seems. It's almost like someone listened to Talking Heads' Once in a Lifetime and thought the chorus might make a good movie pitch. "This is not my beautiful house, this is not my beautiful wife. My God. What have I done?" (Yes I'm paraphrasing).
Brosnan playing a baddie is interesting I suppose, something he has done more of in recent years (Seraphim Falls, The Ghost) but here he is doing an accent. An "Oirish" accent, and would you believe he can't do a very good one? Stick to your normal voice, Pierce. Anything else is distracting.
Anyway, Pierce's terrible accent is not the problem with this film The problem is I just didn't care. None of the characters are likable, none of them. I didn't care what happened to any of them and because I didn't care all the twists and reverses were dull. Give us someone we can empathise with or don't bother at all.
One plus note: Nicholas Lea who played Krycek in the X-Files turned up briefly at the start and I got all excited but he doesn't stick around. Shame. If you get the choice between this and Death Train pick Death Train every time.
Meh. 1 out of 5 Joe Bob stars. Now on to Taffin